— IT ALWAYS COMES WITH EJACULATION ORGASM?
— Ejaculation does not always mean orgasm, as well as Vice versa. Ejaculation is born in the penis and orgasm in the brain. Most men first have an orgasm, and a second or two later-ejaculation.
Therefore, those who are guided in the art of love, for example, Indians, are able to restrain ejaculation after orgasm to continue sex. In India, this is called the technique of a thousand tremors. They can make a thousand frictions in the vagina or anus before ejaculation occurs. They are excited by 60, 70, 80, 90, 95 %, reach psychological orgasm — which from ejaculation usually separate two of seconds — and deter sexual activity, not to cum. Excitation decreases to 70 or 40 %. And again. This is a very rare skill in our latitudes.
— AS FOR EJACULATION WITHOUT ORGASM?
— My patients who have problems with their mother or other women who shame them have ejaculation without orgasm. Because they have a red light in their head: “I can not be good with a woman, a woman is the worst evil.”
EJACULATION WITHOUT ORGASM — LIKE TO SEE PICTURES OF FOOD INSTEAD OF BREAKFAST.
— Not always. After forty in many men these phenomena diverge — they can have ejaculation, but not have an orgasm, and Vice versa.
WHY?
— Because orgasm is born in anybody. When you excite, flirt with you, seduce you, the atmosphere of sex reigns, orgasm turns out, and very pleasant. And when to exit in 25 minutes, you’re in a hurry, you can orgasm and not feel it. Similarly, when you quarrel with a partner or partner. Satisfaction can not break through a sense of anger, resentment, dislike, sadness.
For many men it is a big surprise that there are different types of orgasms.
— REALLY?
— When a person is sad, experiencing grief after the loss of a loved one, loss of work, he will have an orgasm, but such as if it was not. Easy. Like a fog. Something flashed, but somewhere in the distance. Orgasm, like a shooting star.
Another orgasm is for non-sexual reasons. Someone is tense or feels anger, rage and hatred! Orgasm happens, but it can be compared with the feeling: “Fuh… Well, all behind.”
— SECOND RELIEF.
— This kind of orgasm is common among sex addicts. I often hear from them this phrase: “I sat down on a bench for a second, now I will go further.”
The next orgasm is like a cold shower. It is similar to the previous one, but its purpose is not to relieve tension, but to produce new energy. Orgasm as an energy drink. I was very hot, so I put my head under the tap. It very often happens as a result of Masturbation, for example, in people who work at the computer at night and feel tired. I heard about this type of orgasm from programmers who work from eight in the evening to five in the morning. Rest and mobilization.
— AND, PROBABLY, THE REWARD FOR HARD WORK.
— Finally, there is a spilling orgasm, in which the whole body is involved. Usually in people who before sex are long excited. Caresses, kissing, long foreplay. They have to come to orgasm, but they don’t do it, then again, and again they abstain. This is like the Indian technique thousands of aftershocks. In that case, this delayed orgasm — BANG! Orgasm-knockout, after which you lie on your back in bed.
— IS THERE SOMETHING ELSE?
— There is an orgasm in which the feeling of joy is mixed with distrust and gratitude. He very often the case in sex have young people with senior. Even when this sex is qualitatively worse than that which happens to contemporaries, the authority of the adult person does the. My client, who slept with a Professor during the conference, whom she respected very much, told me that she still remembers this evening, despite the fact that the age Professor had neither a super strong riser, nor a special passion. This orgasm is a reward.
There is also an orgasm of two experienced lovers who use their rich experience, or an orgasm in a new relationship in which there is mutual admiration, great love. It’s an earthquake orgasm. Such lovers say that they seem to be electrocuted, they have convulsions. In their brain beat phenethylamine, oxytocin, endorphin, dopamine. This cocktail explodes in the brain and genitals.
— I THINK THIS ORGASM IS THE REWARD. TO A COUPLE OF REGULAR LOVERS BECAME A PAIR OF EXPERIENCED LOVERS, THEY MUST KNOW EACH OTHER, TO FEEL. BUT IT’S WORTH IT!
— It is also necessary to say about the orgasms that come from supporters of BDSM. They are more often based on sensations in the brain, rather than physical. The dominant person feels that the second will do everything he is told. And the bottom feels satisfaction from humiliation, execution of orders.
AND THEN SOMETIMES, ORGASM WITHOUT EJACULATION? MENTAL?
— Yeah. The submissive often does not even have an erection, but he feels satisfaction. A kind of “bottom” orgasm of the dependent person. The dominant will also have a dizzying sense of power, domination. Orgasm is not always equal to ejaculation.
— TOO MANY OF THESE ORGASMS.
There’s more. Orgasms in adult couples with a lot of experience, let’s say, politically correct. I mean, they’re nice, warm. Nice and without follies. Like warm milk. Heart orgasms.
WHAT ABOUT ORGASMS IN PAIRS THAT GO COASTING?
— Very interesting there are orgasms in pairs, in which for a long time nothing happened in sex, and suddenly it turned out that someone had a lover on the side, and the second half is mobilized and begins to fight. Sometimes even the one who changes fights for the return of the partner. If it turns out — there is a revival of emotional connection, and they experience orgasms of a new quality. As if the pair had reached a new, higher level of play. We call it a honeymoon. Such orgasm together with struggle, despair, fear of loss. Typhoon orgasm.
BUT WE DO NOT APPRECIATE THOSE ORGASMS?
— Absolutely. One thing to be clear: orgasms in sex addicts — as bad habits. It’s like you punctured a half-blown balloon that was hanging off the floor a few days after the party.
IS WELL SHOWN IN THE MOVIE “SHAME”. THE MAIN CHARACTER, PLAYED BY MICHAEL FASSBENDER IS ADDICTED TO SEX AND NOT FEEL PLEASURE FROM IT. HE IS CAUGHT UP IN THIS SEX, WHICH FOR HIM WAS GRAY AND DULL, BUT IT IS NECESSARY FOR EXISTENCE. AS IF HE NEEDED ANOTHER DOSE OF THE DRUG.
— He firmly mired in this habit, it was a very deep phase of addiction. And orgasm is a mixture of different feelings, and in life there are different orgasms. It all depends on the constituent elements.
— AND CAN “WORK” ON THAT ORGASM IF YOU WANT?
— You can think of how to act to experience certain feelings. But each person has his own orgasm. This is a very subjective thing. Sometimes clients tell me about their orgasms and want to know if it’s normal or not. As if I were determining their rate. In sex, everything that both partners agree to is normal.
— SOMEWHERE I READ ABOUT A MAN WHO COULD REACH ORGASM WITH MY MIND. I THINK HE EVEN DEMONSTRATED HIS ABILITY IN PUBLIC.
In the postwar years in the United States published the famous “Kinsey report” which destroyed the social stereotypes about sex and prepared the revolution. It mentions four men who achieved orgasm without touching their genitals. They focused only on their sexual fantasies. There were two such people in my office. One fantasized on the topic of BDSM, the other — represented complex emotional and erotic intrigues in his Corporation.
THE SECOND CASE SOUNDS PARTICULARLY INTERESTING.
— Many women and few men can bring themselves to orgasm, fantasizing and not touching intimate places. This ability often develops in people who grew up in an environment where they were threatened. From threats they fled in the world fantasies, dreams, where can be was not only find rest, but and sexual satisfaction.
— MEN CAN FAKE AN ORGASM?
— Yeah. I have in month case roughly three couples, in which a man from-for problems with erection mimics orgasm, and partner his on this but. This is often the fault of pornography, which makes us dependent on powerful stimuli that we do not get in everyday sex.
This is a sign of our time. In the past, if someone faked an orgasm, it was a woman, and a man, if he didn’t want sex, didn’t do it, that’s all. And now men force themselves to have sex, imitate orgasms, and then they end up from porn, secretly. I advise everyone to watch the film “don Juan’s Passions”, which shows the mechanism of dependence on pornography. The hero of this film happens to have a strong erection just from the sound of the laptop turning on. A perfect example of classic addiction.
YOU MAY CHECK WHETHER MIMICS THE MALE ORGASM?
— Yeah. During orgasm, there are contractions of the anus. Just put your finger on it to find out the truth.
ANAL HOLE WILL TELL THE TRUTH. INTERESTINGLY, IT CAN BE FOUND IN SUCH UNEXPECTED PLACES. TELL ME AGAIN, WHAT IS THIS — AN ORGASM.
— During orgasm, diastolic blood pressure, which is usually 65 mm Hg. art., rises to about 160, and systolic — from 120 to 250. The pulse, which is usually 70-80 beats per minute, reaches 150-250 beats. Due to lack of oxygen quickens breathing, reduces the ability to feel the tastes and smells. Hearing and vision weaken so that a man can not see objects around. Scrotum shrinks, testicles swell from pressure and often increase in and a half times, and have some even doubled. As a rule, they rise, sometimes (rarely) almost disappear into the abdominal cavity. Some men at this point, almost losing consciousness.
After orgasm, a man needs to regenerate, for example, turn on his side and fall asleep. This period is called the period of refraction.
— I’M NOT SURPRISED. THE PRESSURE INCREASES, THE HEARING DETERIORATES, THE SCROTUM SHRINKS, A MEMBER OF THE SHOOTING MILLIONS OF SPERM… THE WONDER THAT MEN SURVIVE.
— That’s why oxytocin is released after orgasm. This hormone causes drowsiness so that at this time glycogen, the natural fuel of the muscles, restores and strengthens them after sexual intercourse. It is a gift of mother nature to a man to preserve his ability to reproduce. The refraction period is the time of regeneration, of recuperation, to prepare the army for a new battle.
In addition, the more a man is satisfied with his attack, the more dopamine is produced in the brain, and it also causes drowsiness.
— THAT IS THIS COMMON AMONG MEN, THE TENDENCY TO FALL ASLEEP AFTER SEX INCORRECTLY BLAMED ON BAD MANNERS?
— This is an absolutely natural evolutionary mechanism. At this point, we are slightly (and sometimes strongly) at odds with women, so on this basis, conflicts often occur. It is important that women remember that a man falls asleep after a really good sex.
— AND IF SHE FELL ASLEEP? PROBABLY FAKED AN ORGASM!
— The wife of one of my clients is very quarrelsome, quarrelsome and categorical woman. That even a witch in General. But they’re together, and they’re having sex because he feels he has to satisfy her.
— IT SEEMS THAT THE SENSE OF DUTY IS NOT THE BEST FEELING WHEN IT COMES TO SEX.
— It is difficult to say something good about the quality of their sex and orgasms that my wife is also criticized. At the same time he still has a mistress, a little older than him, who after each orgasm says: “You are so courageous, you have such a member, you fucked me so!”. And it helps him, after this sex, he feels good and he immediately tends to sleep. And at home after sex, which does not bring him pleasure, he does not want to sleep, he is nervous.
THE PENIS IS VERY SENSITIVE AFTER AN ORGASM — IT’S A DEFENSE MECHANISM OR DUE TO REFRACTION?
He’s sensitive because we have the excitement performs like a protective function.
Let me give you an example that I encountered in women. Sometimes they say that when they are busy with something during the day, and a man comes up and pinches them or grabs their Breasts, it is not something pleasant. But the same touch they perceive quite differently when excited, and around the appropriate atmosphere. Then it is pleasant and even desirable.
AND YOU CAN TOUCH THEM.
— Even necessary. The same for men after orgasm. Head, bridle do not want to be touched, as the excitement has passed. However, even during sex men have very different feelings from a touch to these places.
Important note — it is because of refraction sexologists have developed a rule that orgasm in women should always be the first. Because a man after his orgasm feels squeezed like a lemon. After psychological orgasm still nothing, and here is after ejaculation — all, finish.
— BUT IF WE’RE TALKING ABOUT CONTACT WITH A MAN MAN?
— You need to try to achieve simultaneous orgasms, which is not always possible. Basically I advise that both partners feel responsible for their pleasure, and if the first has finished and passed out, the second must bring himself to orgasm. Or shouldn’t, because that’s not the goal. Sex — registration of proximity, sensuality, intimacy.
— IT TURNS OUT THE JOINT ORGASM HIGH SCHOOL.
— In the book about disorders erection Enduring Desire (“Strong desire”) by Michael Metz and Barry yo, Catherine presents the results of studies that show that among the well-working and sexually satisfied couples, less than half gets equal sexual satisfaction.
— HOW LONG DOES THE PERIOD OF A REFRACTION?
— From fifteen minutes to several hours, and sometimes days.
— HO-HO!
— Usually it is genetically determined, and the son will be the same as his father and grandfather. The period of refraction increases if a man does not follow himself well, eats worse, moves less, is constantly in tension, irritated and so on. However, regardless of this, the refraction period will be extended after 25 years.
AND AT SOME POINT WILL BE THAT THE DAILY MERRYMAKING WILL BE NO MORE.
— Therefore it is important to approach sex with pleasure, to lengthen it, to reach 90 % of excitement, to stop, and then to continue. Because if you ejaculate — that’s it.
The difference between men and women is that men’s sexuality — like a NASA rocket sent into space — we get excited easily and quickly disappear from sight. Female sexuality is a Dreamliner: they need a long runway to take off, and then they can be watched in the sky for a long time.
— HOWEVER, THERE ARE MEN WHO CAN START SEVERAL TIMES IN A ROW.
— Yes, but they’re a minority. But most women after one orgasm can quickly reach the second, and so in a circle. It’s called multi-gasm.