— MANY MEN CLAIM TO LOVE WOMEN WHO TAKE INITIATIVE IN BED.
— They dream that it would be cool to meet a sexy cat with whom you can do everything. But when in reality meet such a lady, and she takes the initiative in their hands, they panic. They are afraid that she will crush them with her passion, knowledge, experience in sex. In reality, men prefer passive women who don’t feel they have to do something outstanding.
“POLITICALLY CORRECT WOMEN” – IN POLISH AND IRANIAN REALITIES.
In the current political situation in Poland, women’s sexuality is increasingly limited. The difficulty with access to contraception, the next day’s pills, the abortion ban, the limitations of prenatal research are the most striking examples. Interestingly, politicians do not prohibit men from using remedies for erection problems. Men, especially right-wing men, come to me here and say, rubbing their hands, ” Finally I will recoup the years they have been fighting for emancipation, talking about their needs and wanting to rule in sex!”.
THE POLE RISES FROM HIS KNEES.
And with that train of thought, he shoots himself right in those knees. So intimidated woman does not want to have sex for fear of pregnancy or fetal diseases. I am surprised when I see in the office how often men are unable to connect the low sexual desire of a partner with the fear of pregnancy.
No one brings their partners to me more often than the right. Complain: she does not have sex, she has no ideas and so on. At the same time, when as a result of our work she has these very ideas, the client says to me: “but, Andrzej, I was not talking about such results! Where it is seen that the woman herself told me that she wants sex!”.
— I UNDERSTAND THAT POLISH WOMEN USUALLY DO NOT SHOW INITIATIVE IN SEX?
— This situation has a deep base laid by our culture. Many of my patients say: “I love sex, but only when the initiative comes from a partner.”
Continue the conversation:
— Does your partner know you like sex?”
Well, I think he knows.
“But you tell him that?”
“Sometimes I think it’s obvious. Besides, I’d be ashamed to say it. He might not want to have sex, feel embarrassed, like I’m harassing him. Men are afraid of slutty women.
— I’LL LIE DOWN AND SEE IF HE KNOWS.”
— It’s not quite true, this medal has two sides. We are talking about the features of female sexuality. This was written by American researcher Helen Kaplan. A woman may not experience any excitement or desire-often it is the caress of a man that makes her want to have sex.
A man often needs excitement to think about sex. Let us not confuse arousal with erection: we are talking about a certain thinking, a state of thought. And a woman can get aroused when someone pays attention to her. To the woman felt a excitement, often need to work. Michael Bader, author of Male sexuality, wrote: “Sex is born in the head and goes down, not Vice versa.” The main sexual organ of a woman is the brain. Men, by the way, too. Every heterosexual man should remember that.
AND NOT TO GO IMMEDIATELY TO TOUCH.
And learn to seduce.
— IT SEEMS THAT THE WESTERN WORLD STOPPED SEDUCING AROUND THE SECOND HALF OF THE TWENTIETH CENTURY.
— My client-the Builder had a problem-the wife regularly refused sex. I asked him, ” how do you approach this sex?”. “As usual, fine —” he says. — I go up to her and say, is there work today?”»
— VERY ORIGINAL.
99 % of women will answer that today there will be no work.
In addition, many men think that a woman controls her ability to get pregnant. It is unknown where they think that woman can do everything and always. Perhaps this thought was born from the belief that a woman can bind a man to her child, that is, consciously plan a pregnancy. This is absurd.
— FROM THE BELIEF THAT A WOMAN CONTROLS FERTILITY TO THE BELIEF THAT IF SHE DOESN’T WANT TO, SHE WON’T HAVE SEX.” THAT’S HOW SOME PEOPLE TRY TO JUSTIFY RAPE.
— That’s what I hear from my patients when they talk about a possible pregnancy.” They are absolutely sure that the woman can compress legs, a vagina, not to allow the man to penetration-if wants. They don’t want to accept the fact that it’s physical and mental abuse, that the attacker is most often bigger, stronger and acts in a deserted place and unexpectedly.
Some men also believe that when a woman is raped, she will not be able to get pregnant, as her body will not accept unwanted sperm.
I once asked such a man, since he believes that a woman can control the onset of pregnancy by force of will, whether he himself can make his sperm at his will be active, then not. He got angry and shouted that his sperm is always fertile.
— A FRIEND OF MINE CARES A GREAT DEAL ABOUT THE WOMEN HE MEETS. ALTHOUGH HE IS SERIALLY MONOGAMOUS, WITH EACH OF HIS WOMEN HE IS ATTENTIVE AND CARING. PERFECT SON-IN-LAW. BUT RECENTLY, SOME GIRL LOST HER TEMPER, AS HE TOO OFTEN ASKED DURING SEX, IS IT GOOD FOR HER. THAT IS, WOMEN PREFER A SILENT MONSTER?
Men just rarely as gentle barbarians. It seems to them that a strong riser is enough for a woman to jump for joy. Therefore, keeping in touch with the partner, asking about what she likes — it’s great; but, as in any case, you can overdo it. Women appreciate contact with a partner, not that he asked every time if everything is okay, whether it is possible to go further.
Some men perceive sex as a computer game — before each action they issue a request “are you sure?”and the woman should choose Yes.” Don’t be afraid, men, a woman will let you know that something is wrong if something is wrong, especially if you show her that you care about her.
— HOW DO YOU DO THAT?”
— If you and your partner discussed what she likes and what is not, how far you can go-it is enough then to follow this in sex, you do not need to ask again.
Many men sin in sex also that reduce all sex to penetration. I have a lot of clients who think so. At the same time, some women also believe that men only want penetration, even if they themselves claim that this is not the main thing for them.
— WHAT DO MEN THINK ABOUT ORAL SEX?
— They often consider it the highest form of intimacy. “Oral sex? Well, let it be, but only with the woman I really love.”
“THEY UNDERESTIMATE FOREPLAY?”
— Some women are convinced that men only do it for them, that it is a form of self-sacrifice. Sometimes it is absurd when a man is forced to convince a woman that he loves oral sex.
And then these women come to me with orgasm problems or vaginal dryness, and it is impossible to convince them that for enough lubrication and a later orgasm, a good prelude is necessary, including oral sex.